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Patent Pending

“Good morning.”
“Morning. Whaddya got?”
“It’s an egg.”
“A what?”
“An egg.”
“What’s that?”
“There’s a baby chicken inside.”
“A baby chicken INSIDE there?”
“You gotta be kiddin’. How’d you do that?”
“I don’t know. But for the last few mornings, I’ve been laying these things. And after I’ve been around them for a few days, a baby chick comes out. And it looks just like me!”
“And you don’t know how it happens?”
“No, but I can do it again everyday. So I’d like to patent it.”
“Sure. Wow, this is great. Do me a favor, fill out these papers and come back and see me. You don’t have to wait on the line. Just come back to the front.”
“Good morning.”
“Morning. Whaddya got?”
“It’s an egg.”
“Wait a minute. What are you talking about? Did you just get it from that chicken?”
“I’m an alligator. I don’t talk to chickens.”
“So where’d you get it?”
“From me. For the last few months, I’ve been laying these things. I didn’t think anything about them. Then after a few days, baby alligators came out. And they all look just like me!”
“And you don’t know how it happened?”
“No. So I’d like to patent it.”
“Well, it’s certainly bigger than a chicken egg and the shell is much thicker. But I’m afraid an egg is an egg and, buddy, you’re too late. Charlie the Chicken over there already applied.”
“Darn it. Just my luck.”
“Good morning. Ossie the Ostrich here.”
“Morning. Whaddya got?”
“I know you won’t believe it. I’ve never seen anything like it before. I call it an egg. There’s actually a baby ostrich in there.”
“Oh yeah? Tell me about it.”

Fish, fowls, reptiles and insects. Unrelated species. Unrelated genus. Many of them lay eggs. Each one packed with the nutrients the baby needs to develop inside until its strong enough to make its way into this world. Each shell – not too thin, not too thick. Just right to withstand the pressure of “egg-birth” but not too thick that the baby can’t peck its way out.

How did it all happen? Multiple accidents of nature or planned parenthood by God?

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by   Max Anteby

Comments icon May 3, 2011


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