… the more beautiful you become.

A lot of people spend a lot of time, money and effort trying to look good, even great.  Others have even higher aspirations, they want to be absolutely beautiful.

Have you ever thought about inner beauty? About what it means to be a truly, deeply beautiful human being? We all know, that while it’s nice to look beautiful, to actually be beautiful is something profoundly valuable and meaningful.

Almost everyone I have ever met has a sense of what it takes to be a truly beautiful human being. Deep down, people know genuine human beauty when they encounter it. I believe that you do too. Try this—

  • Close your eyes and picture someone who you consider to be a beautiful human being, someone who embodies the finest qualities a person can possess.
  • Now ask yourself what it is about that person that makes him or her “beautiful.”

I’m going to guess that the qualities you focused on are the person’s capacity to be a giver that allows you to identify him or her as beautiful. Isn’t it a penchant for being outwardly focused and other-centered that you find to be so beautiful? Isn’t it the person’s benevolence, compassion, kindness, and sincere concern for the well-being of others?

We are transfixed by an artist’s talent and a musician’s melody. We are envious (or at least used to be) of the Fortune 500 CEO. Yet the quality of beauty is not one we necessarily attach to any of these men or women of achievement. Intuitively, however, we associate giving with beauty, and thus, almost instinctively, we want to be friends with “givers” and not “takers,” and we will try to raise children who are “givers” and not “takers.” After all, is there anyone who could proudly refer to her son as, “my son the selfish taker”? A doctor, a professor—but none of these at the expense of being a self-centered taker. To be a giver, is to be beautiful. The more we strive to give, the more beautiful—truly beautiful—we become.

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Comments icon April 17, 2009


By Sara on April 17, 2009 -- 2:18pm

What is the Jewish source for this idea?

By Tom on April 17, 2009 -- 10:28pm

Amen Brother;

May The G-d of Israel, Isaac and Jacob bless you and yours, for your insight.

By Shimon Apisdorf on April 20, 2009 -- 12:50pm


I am not aware of a specific source. 

What I do know is this: the world was created as a pristine act of chesed. Chesed is a Hebrew word that means; good, kind, benevolent giving.  The fabric of the world—of all creation—is giving-kindness—and the world is a startlingly beautiful place.

Think about it. it’s simple, and deep.

By Paul on June 30, 2009 -- 3:01pm

The more beautiful i became just after reading ur article. Truly we tend to be deceived by what the media and other sources portray and define the word beauty.

Thanks for such inspiring articles. May the God i serve richly bless you.

By freeda on July 31, 2009 -- 6:44am

There actually is a torah source for this.  When we were learning Proverbs, when it says yofi and chein, they are translated as:Yofi is the general look, chein is the interest and hanaah (enjoyment) is what people have from the yofi.  People only have interest and hanaah (enjoyment) from yofi if the person’s action are good

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